Change

Art by Nuz from Printerest

Throughout all the dramas and events I've gone through in life, there was one I haven't fully discovered on. And that is change. It's not just the simple type of change definition that you may thinking. It's the change that you do to people. Over the time, I've met people and have changed them. I thought it was all me that changed them. I was wrong. I realized that a little too late and got upset with my own self. 

When I met this person, I thought, not only will I be able to help her, but I could change her. Change her into what I want her to be. Yes. It was selfish of me. I thought my way was the right way. I thought I have been changing her in the right way. Of course, no way is the right way to change. Especially when it comes to someone else and not yourself. If it was myself that was going through changes, if I fail to become what I want I would probably tell myself that it's okay. But I guess it's just harder when it comes to someone else than you. The mistake you see on them is a flaw and not a lesson. I was at fault for doing that. I've realized it a little too late. Too late since the person that I wanted to changed, had showed me that I had no chance of doing that. I pondered a lot on why she wasn't able to change. Was it my method? Was the things and advice did not helped her? Some of you might read this and judge for me being a selfish and bossy person. I promise that my only intention to change that person was because I thought that person could maybe be a better person. Again, I was in no place to judge or try to change that person. Even if that person says that they wanted to change, I did it my way. I didn't precisely looked over their feelings or thinking. Not doing that made them feel pressured and wanted to change faster in order to please me. Again I was at fault. I should have looked over that person's feelings and thinking thoroughly. All this time I thought changing people was easy. All the people that have changed when they be friended me made me think it was easy since I saw the process of them changing while being friends with me. 

And again, I was wrong. I was wrong to think that it's easy to change someone. Even if they told me they wanted to, I shouldn't have done it through my way. Because from what I have learned through this person is that one cannot change the other if the other does not have the will to do so. It was the will that my other friends changed. I may have thought they used my way, but it was their way and their will that changed them. The person who told me that he/she wanted to change does not have the will to change and relied everything on changing towards me. From there I used my own way of changing towards her. Which was why the change did not happen to that person. When wanting to change yourself, you need the will to do it and the support of someone else. But if it only works one way, the change will not happen.